Strange Apple's Blog

Posts Tagged ‘dog

Borrowed from my son:

so here’s an idea of how tired i am. i walk into a room in my house, walk past my dog and say “come on boy” expecting him to follow me. he doesn’t. i call his name again. no answer. i turn around. it’s not my dog. it’s my hi-hats.

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I’m more than a little amazed that L is still being compliant and taking the lithium. He just had his fourth tablet. No arguments, just a little grumbling about me wanting him to eat something with it.

This is a big deal. Every other medication he’s been on has been accompanied by arguments, petulance, refusal etc I hope I’m not jumping the gun thinking that things are going well, but I just can’t help but hope that this is the beginning of things improving.

~

Earlier today, I found a few photos of the dog I grew up with. Beautiful Henry. My best friend. The dog I would dress up in frilly brunch coats and t-shirts when I was younger, and in my teens he was the dog who would faithfully sit by my side for hours on end while I fished for bream and listened to Cat Stevens. Those photos of Henry made me think of something that happened earlier this week.

L came out of his bedroom to find our two dogs lying straight outside his bedroom door. He asked me why they were doing that, and it was a little odd, they’re usually hanging around with me, outside or in A’s bedroom. L was obviously having a down day, and I said that the dogs wanted to be with him, that they could tell that he needed them. He grumbled and said that they were annoying him. “They love you” I said. He just looked at me, with one of the saddest faces I’ve seen. “You don’t want anyone to love you, do you?” I asked. His answer? “No, not really.”

And that breaks my heart.



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  • strangeapple: I don't like to fail, and I feel like I've failed. I think that's what it is. Big knock to my ego. I saw a psych the other week, she made sense, p
  • strangeapple: Holy fuck, I had a doctors appointment this evening that I didn't go to. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
  • corymbia: I do the stiff upper lip thing too. Was worried I was slipping into bona-fide depression last week, but as is usually the case with me... the bad stu

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